Onward, Upward
"Do you know what you're doing next year?"
By the end of senior year, every high schooler feels like gagging at this question, especially if they still haven't committed to a plan. In the last month, I have watched friend after blissful friend find their answer, all the while waiting--somewhat bitterly--for my decision day.
Well, dear readers, it has come.
A couple of weeks ago, while on my break at work, I received a call from my mother. "Your letter from Moody came--do you want me to open it, or do you wanna wait till you get home?"
"No, open it!" I swelled with feverish anticipation, and so did my mother. I could hear it in the tearing of the envelope on the other end. She skimmed the letter and gave me the verdict: Acceptance.
That is, into the online program or Moody's campus in Spokane, Washington. I felt a little cheated.
In December, I decided, after seeking much wise council, to apply to Moody Bible Institute, and only Moody Bible Institute. (As an experiment, I applied to one other school, but I never truly wanted to go there.) I was supposed to hear back in mid-January. After some confusion about my address, the letter finally came in February--to say they would have my deferred decision ready in mid-April. So my support net and I perched ourselves on the edge of our seats and prayed for God's direction.
In the meantime, I got a job that I loved, which complicated the decision. Now I was torn--did I work for a year or go to school? I prayed harder that God would guide.
He did. I was disappointed when the letter came saying they had no room for me at Moody's Chicago campus. No room. That meant no roommates to meet, no pranks to endure, no chapel to sit through, no theology classes to devour--no excitement.
Within a few days, though, a little excitement began to grow in my heart. A gap year. A whole year to explore possibilities. And there are possibilities.
I will work the job that I love.
I will vacation with my family.
I will dive into ministry at church.
I will search for ministry elsewhere.
God has never left me to sit on my hands. Every time I think the excitement's over, it's not. Even reading back over this blog, it's clear that God relishes surprises, changing my plans for the better.
A few weeks ago, my father preached on Romans 8:28: "And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." He reminded us that God is always out for His glory, so the "good" here will not always feel like our good--it's His good. In hearing that for the first time, I felt violated, like God didn't care. But what is the purpose of mankind?
To glorify God.
We can search our whole lives for purpose but this is it. To submit to God's ultimate good, even when we don't like it, is part of our highest calling.
So here I am, unsure where to go except Jesus. Thankfully, He's safe and good, fulfilling me for His glory and my good, even in each change of plans.
So onward and upward it is. Stay tuned for more...
By the end of senior year, every high schooler feels like gagging at this question, especially if they still haven't committed to a plan. In the last month, I have watched friend after blissful friend find their answer, all the while waiting--somewhat bitterly--for my decision day.
Well, dear readers, it has come.
A couple of weeks ago, while on my break at work, I received a call from my mother. "Your letter from Moody came--do you want me to open it, or do you wanna wait till you get home?"
"No, open it!" I swelled with feverish anticipation, and so did my mother. I could hear it in the tearing of the envelope on the other end. She skimmed the letter and gave me the verdict: Acceptance.
That is, into the online program or Moody's campus in Spokane, Washington. I felt a little cheated.
In December, I decided, after seeking much wise council, to apply to Moody Bible Institute, and only Moody Bible Institute. (As an experiment, I applied to one other school, but I never truly wanted to go there.) I was supposed to hear back in mid-January. After some confusion about my address, the letter finally came in February--to say they would have my deferred decision ready in mid-April. So my support net and I perched ourselves on the edge of our seats and prayed for God's direction.
In the meantime, I got a job that I loved, which complicated the decision. Now I was torn--did I work for a year or go to school? I prayed harder that God would guide.
He did. I was disappointed when the letter came saying they had no room for me at Moody's Chicago campus. No room. That meant no roommates to meet, no pranks to endure, no chapel to sit through, no theology classes to devour--no excitement.
Within a few days, though, a little excitement began to grow in my heart. A gap year. A whole year to explore possibilities. And there are possibilities.
I will work the job that I love.
I will vacation with my family.
I will dive into ministry at church.
I will search for ministry elsewhere.
God has never left me to sit on my hands. Every time I think the excitement's over, it's not. Even reading back over this blog, it's clear that God relishes surprises, changing my plans for the better.
A few weeks ago, my father preached on Romans 8:28: "And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." He reminded us that God is always out for His glory, so the "good" here will not always feel like our good--it's His good. In hearing that for the first time, I felt violated, like God didn't care. But what is the purpose of mankind?
To glorify God.
We can search our whole lives for purpose but this is it. To submit to God's ultimate good, even when we don't like it, is part of our highest calling.
So here I am, unsure where to go except Jesus. Thankfully, He's safe and good, fulfilling me for His glory and my good, even in each change of plans.
So onward and upward it is. Stay tuned for more...
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