Celebrate
Last year, I turned sixteen. In honor of this monumental occasion, I threw a glorious birthday party full of delicious food, incredible friends, laughter, flowers, sunshine, hide-and-seek, and so much encouragement that actual tears were shed. I hadn't felt so loved in a long time. After that, I knew I wasn't due for another big party for a while, and I prepared myself for this year to be a let down in comparison to last year. Without my planning something, how could I expect to experience the same feelings of love?
Thankfully, a few weeks before my birthday, I realized that seventeen was an age I had always wanted to be, so I set out to enjoy this birthday to the fullest. I had been reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts, in which she described her journey to discovering that the key to joy is thankfulness. Already I had experienced the pleasure of being thankful--what did I have to lose by employing it on a special occasion?
I began looking forward to the little things. Breakfast with my mom. Youth group on my birthday. Sweet texts and Facebook messages. Cake. And suddenly, my seventeenth birthday didn't look like a let down at all--it looked like pure joy!
Ann Voskamp wrote, "Instead of filling with expectations, the joy-filled expect nothing--and are filled. This breath! This oak tree! This daisy! This work! This sky! These people! This place! This day! Surprise!" (p.170) The secret to fully enjoying my special day did not lie in big plans, but in delighting in the gifts God gives every day.
Oh, and He does give good gifts! My Father in heaven had far bigger plans than I did. The list of blessings stretched out forever. Two days before my birthday, the count started when a group of girls surprised me with a night out:
Thankfully, a few weeks before my birthday, I realized that seventeen was an age I had always wanted to be, so I set out to enjoy this birthday to the fullest. I had been reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts, in which she described her journey to discovering that the key to joy is thankfulness. Already I had experienced the pleasure of being thankful--what did I have to lose by employing it on a special occasion?
I began looking forward to the little things. Breakfast with my mom. Youth group on my birthday. Sweet texts and Facebook messages. Cake. And suddenly, my seventeenth birthday didn't look like a let down at all--it looked like pure joy!
Ann Voskamp wrote, "Instead of filling with expectations, the joy-filled expect nothing--and are filled. This breath! This oak tree! This daisy! This work! This sky! These people! This place! This day! Surprise!" (p.170) The secret to fully enjoying my special day did not lie in big plans, but in delighting in the gifts God gives every day.
Oh, and He does give good gifts! My Father in heaven had far bigger plans than I did. The list of blessings stretched out forever. Two days before my birthday, the count started when a group of girls surprised me with a night out:
- the gift of their presence
- friends, here, in evening sun
- frozen yogurt
- chatter of teenage girls
- laughter late at night
The next day I counted the blessings of a road-trip/college visit with friends:
- radio turned up loud
- license plate games
- friends singing at top of lungs
- long miles together
- encouragement in my messiness
On the day of, the tally climbed high:
- mother-daughter breakfasts
- prayed-for sunshine
- summer outfits
- blond hair in sun
- cake and ice cream
- my brother's balloons
- a wink across the table
- laughing hazel eyes
- night bathed in light of full moon
What I had thought would be a low-key birthday turned into an endless stream of reminders that people love me--God loves me.
God loves me. Haven't I been told this my whole life? When did the truth of this statement become lost on my heart? My habit has become to stop short and rely on human love--or a perceived lack thereof--to measure my worth and satisfaction. This is the root of most of my struggles. Perfectionism, people-pleasing, jealousy, selfishness--all can be traced back to my attempt to fill up on people's affection and approval because I believe God's love will not satisfy. Such is the conflict of One Thousand Gifts, and, indeed, the story of humanity. In turn, that must mean God's redemption story is one of His constantly reminding us of and returning us to satisfaction in His love.
Even as this discovery dawns on me, I know I will forget. To learn to live the redemption story is a life-long journey, and it's not easy, because God's love is fierce and hard sometimes. Today, though, I am so thankful that God used all these gifts to remind me of His love for me and all that it means. And that love and the gifts that come with it are for everyone every day! Now there is a reason to celebrate!
Even as this discovery dawns on me, I know I will forget. To learn to live the redemption story is a life-long journey, and it's not easy, because God's love is fierce and hard sometimes. Today, though, I am so thankful that God used all these gifts to remind me of His love for me and all that it means. And that love and the gifts that come with it are for everyone every day! Now there is a reason to celebrate!
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